Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Troy Aikman is Spanish and Works at the Salad Place By My Job!

Can I just tell you... that when I go to Starbucks, my order isn't so long you feel like you're reading scriptures. I am not one of those people that has a million dietary restrictions, or feels the need to "substitute" at restaurants. I never send things back and I always tip really well even if the service sucks. I guess you could say when it comes to eating and drinking... I'm easy. You can take me just about anywhere and not worry that I'll embarrass you. 

What does this have to do with a God Damn thing, you ask? Well, the hives are gone, and I just spent $11.47 on an f-ing cobb salad (which is more than the shrimp salad which makes me think... why the hell is the bacon more than the shrimp?) but I digress...(I know...I can't help it. My mind just works this way and the more I try to force it to be normal the worse it gets) because the real reason I'm even saying anything about this is because after waiting in a line for 6 minutes and ordering a standard cobb salad after the woman in front of me ordered something that sounded like a mean plan for Demi Moore's kids (e.g. chick peas, alfalfa, light, gluten free, fat free, soy vinagrette with wasabi peas and kale.. yadda yadda more bullshit) the ONLY thing I asked for was no bread. That's it. And so of course she puts the damn bread in the salad and I say, "I said..." and as soon as I start to speak, she takes the bread out, rolls her eyes and throws that sh*t across the room into the waste basket like she's Troy Aikman only she starts speaking Spanish really fast and the whole times she's just glaring at me... (She should apply for a job at the SSA Offfice...she'd fit right in) The whole thing, I thought, was rather dramatic... and you know it pisses me off because it's like the one thing she gets paid to do....the one f-ing thing....is to listen to what people want in their f-ing salad and I only asked for one thing. ONE THING. And somehow you get an attitude with me but not the chick that asked for like 10 special things? Okay getting worked up...don't want hives...calming down now... 

Despite that little incident...the salad was good... really good. 

PS: I know my parents think I should just bring leftovers or make my own lunch...and they would be right but seriously... I'm 29 years old, and the money I'm saving from quitting smoking... well... I think I should be allowed to buy an over priced salad if I want to...

PSS: Would have totally smoked 3 cigarettes after that happened if I were still smoking...but instead I walked past some construction workers...and that helped.

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